Thurman@WORK

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Sunday, August 16, 2009

"Healing From a Highly Emotional Break-up."

The old saying that "what doesn't kill you-BLAH, BLAH, BLAH... is convenient, but those are the quoted axioms of the lousy and "in love". They are not the sentiment of the heart broken and emotionally distraught. Their feelings are best left to sadness and loss, but why? What are they losing, but yet another great opportunity to learn about themselves? The agony many feel is heart wrenching and inconsolable, but is treatable and preventable.

Many people ache for the hand of sympathy and the epiphany of their misunderstood love. The many that feel hopeless are unaware that they have only to learn how to deal with their E-Motions or energy in motion.

From a very young age you should be taught how to deal with your emotions in a very functional and practical way. Unfortunately, there are adults that never learn how to deal with their emotions either, because their parents never taught them or their parent did not know themselves. The key to gaining emotional empowerment lay dormant within you and not someone or anything else.

Most people seek out the distraction of other people’s angst. Other people look for the distraction of food, sex and alcohol. And the rest are motivated by their self loathing. But here lies an opportunity to redeem from within and learn how to work on the “YOU”. People love the distraction of life, usually the lives of others, which give them the perfect opportunity to delay their innate healing.

It takes courage to heal, but it takes strength to stay focus and cancel out the distractions of fear and regret. I am not here to ask you to avoid people, places or things. All that I ask is that you ignore distractions that would delay your healing.

Preventable & Treatable Ways

The question on “How do you heal from a High E-motional break-up” is simple if you look at the anatomy of your emotional make up.

Ask yourself:

1. Are you a needy person?
2. Are you a co-dependent person?
3. Were you ever explained what emotions where?
4. Where does this pain hurt the most?
5. Do I know how to deal with separation and loss?
6. Is “Love” the reason I feel what I feel or have I not learned to process and separate my range of emotions from “LOVE.”
7. Could the other person just not be for me?
8. Is this my EGO making my decisions for me?
9. Does my need for loving someone else over shadow the real love I need for me?
10. How can I utilize this E- Motional (energy in motion) body to create a better life for me?
11. Do I know the difference between LOVE & LUST?

Challenging your expectations is another way of healing from a “Highly E-Motional” break-up.
Am I a person that needs every emotional act reciprocated back to me?
If you are, c
orrect that immediately. Develop a method that would allow you to give of yourself freely without expecting something back. Usually people find it hard to do this because they feel, falsely, that they are being used. This is accompanied by a since of entitlement, however the truth of the matter is that no one owes you anything. However you owe yourself the world outside of selfish bargaining, you do, with the one you think you love.

Take the time to differentiate a passionate relationship from a passionate experience.
Often time we think we are having a passionate relationship when we are just having a passionate experience-it just last more than a one night stand. Our expectations on feelings rather perceived or unperceived set us up for emotionally disaster. Depending how we take on the feelings and onsite process of the experience determines proper healing. Learn where you are standing in the moment and see things as they are as opposed to the trappings of distorted fixations based in your crotch. Love the moment, encompassing every element, instead of just the person you are with.


No mathematical formula or vengeance can cure your dis-ease with yourself. You are the master of it all and your body mind and soul will tell when it is time to H.E.A.L. Tune into the healer within, it cures all.