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Monday, June 2, 2008

Invisible Men Category: Romance and Relationships
Invisible Men
J. Thurman
Ralph Ellison wrote about the Invisible Man. A man whom was unseen by society. No matter how he tried to separate and distinguish himself he was forever brand beast. There are legions of men all around invisible to women who are in the prime of their beauty, health and intelligence, who are drowning in their fear. These men appear as shadows glimmers of light spoken about by most women in the same breath of ancient apparitions and mythology.
There once were stories of a kind of man that frightened most women to the point that those women would avoid all eye contact and acknowledgment. Women became ambivalent even to their existence until one day they vanished. They said that eye contact would give some men a since of human connection and kindness with their counterparts. That kind of kindness was perceived as weakness by most women and was all too often costly to their safety that was masked by their emotions. Fear drove their campaign to wipe out all MEN.
A campaign mostly driven by the media and tales of dreams and expectation deferred. So, one day they vanished. All that was let were shallow figments of a hopeful imagination superficial store houses where women could put their unrealistic expectations and misplaced insecurities. They looked like men ,but they never quite stood the test of time and suffered from poor craftsmanship. Women accepted this replica and hoped to fill this facsimile with all the things they thought a man should, "BE". Some women never knew a man and only lived through the tales of long ago. Other women worked hard to get rid of the remnants of what they thought were men including memories of kind gestures, smiles and gallantry all taken for granted and long gone. Every man was suspect by there very presence.Then they're where those responsible for wiping the mind print of women who never knew the soft subtlest of a man these women were the most stoic and broken of them all. They told horrifying tales of them being victimized by villainous men and because of their inability to utilize their higher sense of self they fell back on their overdeveloped sense of mistrust to will good men into oblivion.
Numb to their surroundings most women lose themselves in the Matrix. A lot of women were consumed by cell phones, IPODS and dark shades some women went to incredible extremes to avoid and ignore all men except the ones that constantly disappointed them. The shade help avoid undesirable eye contact and allows them to judge while keep their distance. There are men who became there only reality. Menwho became a failed expectation someone who could consume their time, money & energywhose every step could be easily predicted- as to not get hurt. But these men were not good men because all of the good men were gone.
Avoiding every man was the answer. Living in constant fear of harm from every man seemed to be the answer. Also, just not wanting to be bothered was another justification to avoid them. A lot of women just seemed to not know how to handle men, so avoiding all of them was the key. "They just want sex",( and women never do) and a plethora of other excuses defend their lack of confidence, lack of conversation or PERSONAL DEPTH. It seems that a stack of irrational fears start to cripple some women from differentiating good men from bad men, hence the disappearance of "Good Men".
I overstand how hard it is to be scrutinized, but I could never know what it is like to be under the scrutiny that black women are subjugated. Nevertheless, avoidance is not the answer, courage is. The courage to deal with how you feel in your skin and learn to exude the innate power and confidence that, when examined, would remove the discomfort that exist. You can not avoid people and you certainly can not avoid men, however you can learn to control your environment and the people that come in your circumference. Once you master your environment you began to make better "men decision". Then and only then will the Good Men reappear in abundance.

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